Poison (Adult Content)

So this evening, we're laying in bed and McHusband tells me he's not feeling well.

Great. Everyone knows how incredibly whiny most men are when ill. Just what I need!

I jump up to get the thermometer, take his temp. Nada. He's fine.

So much whining (from him) and eye rolling (me) later, he tells me he knows why he's sick.

Wait for it..........................

"I think it's because I need a hand job. All the old sperm is poisoning me."

*sigh*

And yes, he's still "sick"

Touch Yourself!

Last day of the month is a great time to do a self breast exam.

Here are some simple instructions from breastcancer.org

Step 1: Begin by looking at your breasts in the mirror with your shoulders straight and your arms on your hips.

Here's what you should look for:

• Breasts that are their usual size, shape, and color
• Breasts that are evenly shaped without visible distortion or swelling

If you see any of the following changes, bring them to your doctor's attention:

• Dimpling, puckering, or bulging of the skin
• A nipple that has changed position or an inverted nipple (pushed inward instead of sticking out)
• Redness, soreness, rash, or swelling

Step 2: Now, raise your arms and look for the same changes

Step 3: While you're at the mirror, gently squeeze each nipple between your finger and thumb and check for nipple discharge (this could be a milky or yellow fluid or blood).

Step 4: Next, feel your breasts while lying down, using your right hand to feel your left breast and then your left hand to feel your right breast. Use a firm, smooth touch with the first few fingers of your hand, keeping the fingers flat and together.

Cover the entire breast from top to bottom, side to side—from your collarbone to the top of your abdomen, and from your armpit to your cleavage.

Follow a pattern to be sure that you cover the whole breast. You can begin at the nipple, moving in larger and larger circles until you reach the outer edge of the breast. You can also move your fingers up and down vertically, in rows, as if you were mowing a lawn. Be sure to feel all the breast tissue: just beneath your skin with a soft touch and down deeper with a firmer touch. Begin examining each area with a very soft touch, and then increase pressure so that you can feel the deeper tissue, down to your ribcage.

Step 5: Finally, feel your breasts while you are standing or sitting. Many women find that the easiest way to feel their breasts is when their skin is wet and slippery, so they like to do this step in the shower. Cover your entire breast, using the same hand movements described in Step 4.

Our RAKers!

Here are the lovely people out there, trying to make this world a better place.

Go show them some lovin!

Anji at I wasn't born a soccer mom
A blog is about life with boys! She's imperfect and proud of it!

Jamie at Simply Jamie
Life with her little man, random musings and great writing!

Stacy at Sara Rose Tutus
A place for gorgeous tutus for the princess in your life.

Stacy again at Busy Mommy Product Reviews
This blog features great (GREAT) giveaways, and insightful product reviews.

HE Eigler at Maternal Spark
A great blog for creative mamas everywhere!

SpunkyMama at Funky Spunky Mama
A great AP mama, with some cool dreds and a sadistic streak when it comes to Barbie

Amy at Five Flower Mom
Mom of many, just trying to make it all work! She's going green, homeschooling and sharing her life.

Original Grits
Not your typical southern belle. She's got a mind of her own, and she's damn proud of it!

Ribbon Rock Star
A very talented mama, making bows, raising kiddos!

Posh Mama
THE Posh Mama - nuff said!

Tricia at Shout!
Funny, very smart, sweet blogger. She will really hit home with you. A must read!

Yay BUTTON!

It's up!! Look to the right.

All you do is copy the code, and paste it (HTML mode) in your side bar.

Simple!

Don't forget to post here about it, so I can add you to our RAK list!

RAK: Monday

So, I got great response from my post last week, and decided NOT to give this up. If ONE person does something out of the ordinary, something kind, it's worth it (even if I never hear about it).

I'm also taking the advice of my good friend Stacy (visit her at Busy Mommy Product Reviews) and I'm going to make a button, for you to share on your site (if you want to!) to help spread the word. This is important to me, and I hope it is to you. So keep your eyes peeled for it. If you do install it on your site, comment and I'll comprise a list of those that link to us, and link back to you on our RAK list!

This week, I want you to go buy a card for someone. A generic greeting card is cool - just an "I'm thinking of you" type thing and mail it to someone. Preferably someone you don't talk to often, maybe a far away Aunt, or a friend you miss.

I *love* getting mail (except for bills)! And, if I were to open my mailbox and have a sweet card from someone, well that would just make my day! We often let life get in the way, so lets fix that!

Go forth and be kind!

Hobby

I fancy myself an amateur photographer. Heavy on the amateur. I do love to take pictures though. I took these today, and just wanted to share. They are not great by any means, but nice enough for a novice like me.

Nana's First Haircut!

Before:



During:



After:

Mmmm Sausage

This evening, McHusband was giving the girls a bath and I was in there, watching them play. I've had a headache now for several days that just won't leave (I've got Chiari Malformation, it's a side effect).

I was rubbing the back of my head and McHusband says, "we'll try something later to get rid of that" *wink* - because like all men, he thinks sex is a magic cure for everything.

I said, "you really think slipping me the sausage is going to help??" *sarcasm*

Nana says, "Mmmm sausage. I love sausage!".

Just ick.

The books

Are back where they belong.

Nana went to throw something away, and saw her princesses in the trash. In her saddest voice ever, she asked "I can't play with them anymore, right? They are gone forever?". I told her that we could take them out of the trash, if she picked up her books.

She did! It worked.

*sigh of relief*

Some days

I wish I still believed in spanking.

Today, Nana starts screaming (not crying, screaming) out of the blue. I rush into her room, expecting to see blood and bone. Instead, I see that she has managed to spill all of her books from her bookshelf onto the floor. I ask her to calm down, see if she's hurt. She's not, so I ask her to please pick up the books.

"No, I won't pick them up".

Now, had she said, "mama, I need help please", I gladly would have helped her. Instead, I get sass.

I ask her again to pick them up.

"NO - I won't do it! NO NO NO NO"

At this point, I'm frustrated. But, I remain calm. I tell her to pick up her books, or we will have to throw all her princesses (very extensive, prized collection) in the trash. I'm thinking at this point I'm brilliant and am giving myself invisible pats on the mommy back.

"Ok, let's throw them away!" - said with more than a little glee. Sadistic little shit.

Fine. I have to follow through at this point, or else everything up to this has been pointless. I'm rarely pointless.

So, I make her gather all her princesses, put them into a grocery sack (all the while trying to explain that the finality of this, to no avail). We say goodbye and dramatically put them in the trash.

I can't believe it went this far. I expected total meltdown well before this.

15 minutes later, she asks, "Ariel is in the trash?".

Ahhh success!! Lesson learned and now we can move on.

Or not.

"Yep, Ariel is in the trash, along with all your other princesses because you wouldn't pick up your books" says mommy.

"Good job mama! You're such a big helper!".

This parenting thing just gets harder/more interesting by the minute.

RAK Tuesday

This is going over like a lead balloon, so today might be my very last RAK post.

This week, I want you to buy something for a stranger. Yep, I said it. When you head to the convenience store, and there is a person getting a coke in front of/behind you, pay for them. If you're in the drive through, pay for the person behind you. I know money is tight for everyone right now, but a little kindness could go so far for someone.

Go forth and be kind!

These are my confessions

I like country music.

I'm currently letting my 1 year old self feed yogurt so I can blog without interruption. Yes the mess sucks, but the time I get is worth it.

We have the TV on Nick most days. I don't care.

I'm addicted to Dr. Pepper. Bad.

I'm an atheist. I cringe when I think about discussing this openly on this blog. It's not a secret, but it's not something I shout from the rooftops either. There is definitely a stigma attached. I don't want people to judge me, though in most areas of my life I don't care. My spirituality (or lack of) is very personal to me, a very long hard journey, and to think that it would change how people view me scares me. But, there is it.

I've been spending more time on the internet than playing with my kids. This is something I'm working on, but the internet can be a bit of an addiction. Baby steps.

I puffy heart nap time. Lots.

Some days I pretend my day was harder than it really was, so I can get some time alone. I know McHusband would "let" me without a hard day, but it makes me feel guilty.

I'm proud of my kids. Very proud. But a tiny part of me thinks they are great without any help from me.

Being a control freak with OCD tendencies makes for some serious struggles in motherhood. Some days I really feel like it holds me back from being the best I can be.

I try like hell not to judge other moms for their choices, but I honestly do when I hear someone uses CIO on their two week old baby. I fully support a mom's right to do what's best for their children, but in cases like this, it can't be what's best for the baby, but rather what's best for the mommy. That's wrong. Sometimes moms needs come first, but never at the expense of the children.

I yell. I like to consider myself a "recovering" yeller - but the truth is I still do it. Nothing sparks my anger like my kids. Reversely, nothing sparks joy like my kids.

When people read my blog, then tell me things like "you're so honest, it's so refreshing" or "I stayed up until 1AM reading, and I cried!" it's one of the best compliments I can get. I write for me, but if I touch/help someone along the way, it means more to me than words can say.

I probably expect too much from my kids. But, if *I* don't, will they expect enough from themselves one day?

I really don't care for other people's kids. I mean, they are (mostly) cute and all, but I don't have a huge tolerance for them. I like my friends kids, but strangers kids typically irritate me (though I keep it well hidden).

As an aside to the above atheist admission, I feel stiled at times in this Christian oriented society. It's assumed frequently that everyone believes in god. It can be frustrating.

I have big boobs and I'm blonde. This does not mean I'm easy or stupid. It's genetics.

I like myself. I'm proud of who I am. I'm not conceited because of this. Just happy with me.

Stomach Flu

I gots one.

GROAN

Holy babies having babies!

I'm sure most of you have heard this story by now. If you haven't, basically 17 16 year old girls in the same town are pregnant - on purpose. They made some sort of pact to get pregnant and raise their babies together.

In the article, it mentions movies (like Knocked Up and Juno) as potentially having an influence on this decision. I find that ridiculous. I didn't think Knocked Up glorified teen pregnancy at all. For one, she was an adult, with a job. Two, it's a movie. A MOVIE. Are we giving these kids enough credit?

Maybe we are though. I can't wrap my mind around wanting to have a baby at 16. Nothing about it seemed fun/exciting/worth it to me.

I'm forced to wonder if it's the "small town" mentality. I hate to group small towns together like this, but in a lot of cases it's true. Are they crying out for attention or love? Are they lonely? I'd love to know what the thought process was behind this.

Also in the article they mention sex education. Sex education wouldn't have helped here. They knew what they were doing - passing out condoms wouldn't have helped. They simply wouldn't have used them. Sounds to me like they HAD sex education - maybe just not the "right" kind.

Is it their socio-economic status? It's a "poor" fishing town. Boredom? Inadequate education? Poor parenting?

Everyone is so caught up in finding who is to "blame" when we should be focusing on these girls. Their mental status, their health and the future of their babies. Talk to THEM to try to figure out what's going on. Stop speculating (yes, I'm guilty of that).

Some Random Thoughts

Yesterday I ran to the grocery store. I needed diapers and milk. I walked out with:

Mint Oreos (currently munching)
Chocolate Chip/White Fudge Cookies
Maple frosted cinnamon rolls
Watermelon
Mini-Cupcakes
Frozen Pizza
Diapers
Milk

Healthy - not! I can't even blame AF, as she's on her way out. Apparently I have a huge sweet tooth right now.

Networking is exhausting. I'm trying so hard to get my site, and both my blogs out there - it takes WORK. A lot of work. But, I've met so many awesome people in the process.

My sister, Jamie, is taking a certification test tomorrow, wish her luck!

Windows Vista irritates the crap out of me.

Nana is very, very whiny today.

McHusband has to work tomorrow :(

Pia's diaper rash is looking better :)

I'm addicted to sites like sitemeter, livefeed, etc - pretty much anything that tells me who is coming and where they are coming from. I swear it's becoming an unhealthy obsession.

Shout!

I've never in my blogging career plugged another blogger. I've come across some great blogs - funny, smart and just great reads. But, I've never felt the need to "share" them (other than blog rolling them).

Enter: Tricia

I "met" Tricia on SITS (click to view their AWESOME blog!). She moseyed on over here and read, then commented (yay! I'm such a comment junkie, it's not even funny). Anyway, I clicked on her and was HOOKED. I've been going back over the past few days, reading old posts. She makes me laugh out loud, she makes me think. She's smart, funny and a fantastic writer. I couldn't not share this amazing woman with you guys.

Check out her site here.

Tricia, I'm glad I "met" you mama!

This week

Has really sucked.

Monday - Pia wakes up earlier than usual. Mom gets her and realizes she has a fever. Pia throws up throughout the day, and is just miserable. Mom is feeling bad for punky (and herself), is hot (high of 100), smelling like puke and all around unhappy. Nana is sassy.

Tuesday - Pia sleeps like crap the night before, so everyone is tired. No more throw up or fever, but lots of screaming (SCREAMING). Mom tries to push fluids (Pia won't eat) and even gives a popsicle. No dice. Mom puts the popsicle on a towel, where it melts for her to later sit in. Mom takes Pia to the Urgent Care Clinic, where she is throughly freaked out by the Dr. There is no receptionist, no one in the waiting room. Just Dr. Doom. He's completely weird and has the worst bed-side manner ever. He gives Mom crap for not vaccinating, and tells her to "make sure the kids stay away from each other" (do you NOT know kids??). Then Dr. asks Mom what type of antibiotic Pia can take because she's allergic to Penicillin (who here went to medical school??). Mom is completely relieved to get out of the office. Pia's poor throat is incredibly swollen and covered in white spots. No strep. When Daddy gets home she locks herself in their bedroom because she simply can't take one.more.second. of screaming.

Wednesday - Pia sleeps decently the night before, and the day starts out pretty well. Then nap time comes and Pia only rests for 20 minutes. That means she's once again a tumor in Moms arms. When Mom attempts to clean, it's a disaster. So, Mom cleans Nana's room with a Pia stuck to her. While cleaning the room, Nana "discovers" old toys that she hasn't played with in DAYS and is absolutely no help. Pia proceeds to whine the entire rest of the day. The antibiotics have given her the runs and she has an awful diaper rash on her poor bum. Mom feels bad for her, but is entirely ready to pack up and head to Mexico (ALONE). Dad works until 6:30 and Mom is in tears by the time he finally gets home.

Thursday - It's 10:16 and Pia's still asleep. Mom is begging for a good day, no more rash and no more whines.

I can't make a baby, mom

So says my three year old to me this afternoon.

M: Why can't you make a baby?
N: I don't know mom, these wipes don't work, I think we need to go to the doctor (said in her very serious voice)

Translation?

She had opened the diaper wipe container, taken out every.single.wipe and dumped them into her baby stroller, wanting them to magically form a baby. When they didn't, she got very dramatic, scooped them up and ran out of the room sobbing (a la novella), yelling, "it's not my fault!"

I guess it's off to the doctor for us.

Over 800......

Views in less than a week. Not too shabby.

So, why isn't anyone commenting?? I puffy heart comments - total ego boost for me.

So comment! Even if you don't like what you're reading!

Oh and there are two buttons on the right where you can vote for me ;)

Sassy Style Giveaway

I meant to post this last week, but totally forgot!

We're having a giveaway on our Sassy Style Blog. It's a game of "caption this" - just post a comment and you're entered! You could win a $25 gift certificate to our site.

Happy Captioning!